Monday, March 20, 2017

Christina Woo. Chapter part 5 B2. Wed 12

I think this discussion is what the majority of people unconsciously believe in. Both of the author's discussions are logical, but I oppose to a lot of their ideas. We are all made different, and there is no way that this discussion applies to all families.

Some of the points both author's mentioned are accurate if you see the big picture. For example, Forer thinks that the later children has many advantages because parents are more used to the idea of raising a child. I agree that parents who struggled with the first child are more capable with raising the second child. It is also true that the oldest child can be more independent and responsible. However there are parts that I didn't quite agree with. For example, the part where the author mentions that parents may not welcome their later child as much as they did with their first child. I felt offended reading this line, because I strongly don't agree with Forer. Also with Wither, where she mentions that the later child are less ambitious. Reading the sentences about the youngest child made me feel as if both authors were judging the younger ones, making it seem as if they are all immature and rather light.

I also don't agree with Forer where the author mentioned that the later children don't feel a strong sense of loneliness even when the parent's attention is elsewhere nor do they feel much pressure as the older ones when they don't meet their parent's standards. I disagree. I am the youngest in the family and I'm used to getting attention that once I am left alone, I get the feeling of loneliness to the extreme that I get depressed. In my point of view, I believe that because the later children is always accompanied by someone, it can be easier for them to feel lonely once they are left by themselves, unlike the older child who is usually more independent and mature. My older brother is a good example. I'm sure he feels lonely at times as he is also a human being, but he doesn't show the fact that he is. However, like Wither mentioned, I, the youngest, know how to win my parents over, by either pouting or being charming. I am also much more expressive than my older brother.

Another thing I don't agree is that the youngest child doesn't feel the pressure as much when they don't meet the parents' standards, because I do. I get anxious when I don't meet my parents' standards, and I get very stressed out. Meaning, I want to meet my parents' standards as much as my older brother does.

Going back to Forer's discussion. The last thing I disagree with, is the part that mentions that the oldest child becomes parental towards the younger sibling. This isn't the case, at least not in my family. Speaking of family, I believe that "I" am the one to become more parental towards my brother. My protective instinct increases especially when my parents aren't around. This isn't mentioned in the discussion, but I think it also has to do with the gender. I heard women has more protective instinct, especially when it comes to family.

So in conclusion, I believe people are so used to hearing the birth order characteristics that it may come off as if every family's birth order and hierarchy are the same, when it really depends on the one's personality, their education, family atmosphere, and the environment that they were raised in.

 

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