Sunday, March 19, 2017

Taehun Kim/Chapter 1 part 5 B-2/ Wed 1-2

In two articles written by my Lucille Forer and Pamela Withers, they both discuss 'birth order'. Forer talks about how birth order influences personality, and Withers introduces characteristics in each birth order and the best matches for it. The common ground for both of them is that birth order plays a role in the person's life, making it either difficult, easy, or happy. In my opinion, being the oldest child, especially the male oldest child, is the most difficult. I have three main reasons why I think this way.

 

To begin with, you don't get as much attention as the younger siblings. As you can see in the paragraph above, adults expect the oldest child to be more mature and responsible. Therefore, adults believe that the oldest children can do their job without being asked, thus not requiring as much attention as the younger siblings. However, most children crave for attention from their parents. That's why I think being the oldest, who wants attention just like the younger sibling, may be difficult. I saw in a documentary which featured a family of 12 children. In that documentary, the oldest child said that since there were so many siblings, he grew up without getting much attention from his parents. He also said that especially during puberty, he went through a hard time since there were so many siblings to take care of, and little attention from his parents.

 

Additionally, being the oldest requires a lot of responsibility. Being the oldest, you would have to take care of your siblings when the parents are not present. Also, you'd be responsible for all the family related activities when you grow up. In the case of confucian societies like Korea, for example, being the oldest, especially if you're male, is strenuous. In these kinds of societies, the oldest male child has to be in charge of all the important family events like ancestral rites and traditional holidays. Leading a family isn't easy. It's a difficult job, which demands a lot of responsibility.

 

Finally, other adults expect a lot from you and set stereotyped images of the oldest child. Just because you're the oldest, you're expected to be more mature, and more responsible, and are scolded when you do not act like the oldest. This could be a stress factor among the oldest, as they may not welcome these kinds of 'roles' given by adults. For instance, a friend of mine, who is the oldest of three, fits the situation I mentioned. His parents scold him very harshly when he fights with his brother. The main reason is because since he's the oldest, he should be more mature and yield to his sisters. Without any doubt, being forced to live in roles set by adults would be a stressful, and difficult experience.

 

In conclusion, judging from the fact that being the oldest means not getting as much attention from their parents, being the oldest child meaning requiring a lot of responsibility, and getting expectations from adults to be more mature, I believe that being the oldest child in the family means living the most difficult life among siblings.

 

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