Who is the Real Enemy?
"You too, Brutus?" were the Roman dictator Caesar's last words to his trusted friend Brutus, who violently assassinated him by stabbing his torso 23 times. This brutal incident was such a shock in history that the story of Brutus is still brought up by many people when the word betrayal comes up. There is also a famous saying from Francis Bacon, the English philosopher. 'A false friend is more dangerous than an open enemy.'
We all have at least one friend in life, but are they your real friends or false friends? Does this remind you of anyone who you thought was a friend to you but turned out to be just the opposite? Most people have had at least some kind of experience in choosing the wrong friend, and I want to specify my thoughts about why a false friend is more harmful than an open enemy. I have cut it down to three main points. A false friend is hidden, it gives you mental and physical stress, and it gives an impact on your relationships with others.
First of all, a false friend is hidden and unseen. There was a girl who I thought was a good friend of mine. We were church buddies. After church on a good Sunday, we would go to the mall together and take sticker photos. In fact, hanging out with her was the best part of my Sunday. I had never doubted her since she was a childhood friend. However, one day I read a very hurtful comment about myself on a SNS page that I had to click on to the profile page to see for myself who on earth would write such a rude comment. Turns out that it was my so called friend. I was dumbfounded. Seeing these comments coming from someone who I thought knew well about me, scared me. The feeling of betrayal is difficult to put in words. I would say that it was painful and devastating. If she was someone who never liked me in the first place, I would have at least understood her, and it would have been less disappointing. This painful experience taught me to be more aware and cautious when making new friends, and I learned to appreciate my real friends.
Secondly, having a false friend is worse than an open enemy because you do not know what is behind their smile. To put it in another way, it is kind of like an unseen bullying. As an example, can you imagine the confusion when a friend backstabs you or makes up false stories about yourself to your other friends? The complex emotion such as having mixed feelings of having to deal with a friend who is two-faced may lead to mental illness and heartache. This reminds me of one of my other so called friend who was two faced. She and I were good friends in grade 7. I remember having to skip school before the Christmas holidays began because my grandmother was feeling ill. I had a ritual and habit of giving out Christmas cards to my friends every year, but I was not there to pass it out myself. So I asked her to do me a favor by passing it out for me. She happily agreed. However, after the holidays, I found out that she ripped all of my cards apart and threw it into the rubbish bin. When my other friend told me about what had happened, it ripped my heart into pieces.
Feelings and relationships are the most difficult task. However, I believe that feelings cannot be hidden. Which means that you will be able to feel some kind of false emotions and feelings in the relationship as you spend time with each other. As I believe that no matter how well someone hides or fakes themselves, the feeling of hostility reaches out to the other person.
Lastly, a false friend gives a huge impact on your relationships with other people more than an open enemy, and if they misuse your intentions like my grade 7 friend whom I mentioned above, there would be a higher possibility of ruining your relationships with others. That is because if someone is an open enemy, people may not believe what the enemy says about you, since they know that it is coming from a personal hatred. However, if a false friend talks behind your back, other friends will probably give in to his or her thought because the words are from a close person.
In conclusion, friends have a big impact in our daily lives because relationships with friends can uplift us, or at times, discourage us. A false friends have much more power over your relationships with other people because they tend to know your intentions and your weaknesses. It is important to keep our positive relationships preciously, and learn to cut out the people who does not treasure you or take you for granted. Last but not least, let's not forget to appreciate our real friends.
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