Christina Woo/Friendship/Wed1-2

Who is the Real Enemy?

"You too, Brutus?" were the Roman dictator Caesar's last words to his trusted friend Brutus, who assassinated him in the end. We all have at least one friend in life, but are they your real friends or false friends? Does this remind you of anyone who you thought was a friend to you but turned out to be just the opposite? There is a famous saying from Francis Bacon, the English philosopher. 'A false friend is more dangerous than an open enemy.' Most people have had at least some kind of experience in choosing the wrong friend, and I want to specify my thoughts about why a false friend is more harmful than an open enemy. I have cut it down to three main points. A false friend is hidden, it gives you mental stress, and it gives an impact on your other relationships.

A false friend is hidden and unseen. There was a girl who I thought was a good friend of mine. I never doubted her since she was a childhood friend. One day, I read a very hurtful comment about myself on a SNS page that I had to click on the profile page to see for myself who on earth would write such a rude comment. Turns out that it was my so called friend. I was dumbfounded. Seeing these comments coming from someone who I thought knew well about me, scared me. The feeling of betrayal was painful and devastating. If she was someone who never liked me in the first place, I would at least have understood her and it would have been less disappointing. This experience taught me to be more aware and cautious when making new friends, and I learned to appreciate my real friends. 

Having a false friend is worse than an open enemy because you do not know what is behind their smile. To put it in another way, it is kind of like an unseen bullying. As an example, can you imagine the confusion when a friend backstabs or makes up false stories about yourself to your other friends? The complex emotion such as having mixed feelings of having to deal with a friend who is two-faced may lead to mental illness and heartache. However, feelings cannot be hidden which means that you will be able to feel some kind of false emotions and feelings in the relationship as you spend time with each other. As I believe that no matter how well someone hides or fakes themselves, the feeling of hostility reaches out to the other person.

Lastly, a false friend gives a huge impact on your relationships with other people more than an open enemy, and if they misuse your intentions there is a higher possibility of ruining your relationship with others. That is because if someone is an open enemy, people may not believe what the enemy says about you, since they know that it is coming from a personal hatred. However, if a false friend talks behind your back, other friends will probably give in to his or her thought because the words are from a close person.

          In conclusion, false friends have much more power over your relationships with other people because they tend to know your intentions and your weaknesses. Our relationship with friends are very important and we all want to find our soulmate. Friends have a big impact in our daily life because relationships with friends can uplift us, or at times, discourage us. However, it is better to be single and alone, rather than having a fake or false friend. I believe it is best to have a relationship where there is respect and loyalty. Also, the closer the relationship is, the more important it is to give each other space in order to maintain the relationship going strong. This is something that we should all remind ourselves of. Last but not least, let's not forget to appreciate our real friends.